Journal 8 : This Side of Good and Evil

How do I view the existence of the Exchange Market inside the concentration camp?

The Exchange Market is a place where it sells supplies with high prices, which is actually forbidden in our society. In other words, people don't sell supplies with higher prices publicly, since it is restricted by the society. Thus, definitely I would never view the place positively, if I did not know the purpose of the black market. However, Primo Levi introduced the market as a place for survival. Whether the exchanging supplies require extreme prices, the prisoners had no choice. The prisoners were suffering through lack of food and supplies, which eventually led them to exchange their last piece of clothing to obtain a minimum amount of food. However, the worst thing is, when a prisoner gets caught of not wearing his shirt, he immediately gets beaten by the Germans. The SS officers knew that the prisoners were suffering of hunger and exchanging their shirt was the only way of earning food through the hidden markets. They knew they were not providing enough foods for the prisoners to survive each day. However, they punished the ones who got caught of getting supplies illegally, and this situation was continuing every day. In the end, Primo Levi told “We now invite the reader to contemplate the possible meaning in the Lager of the words ‘good’ and ‘evil,’ ‘just’ and ‘unjust’; let everybody judge, on the basis of the picture we have outlined and of the examples given above, how much of our ordinary moral world could survive on this side of the barbed wire (pg 86).” Truly, the Exchange Market would not be viewed as “good” with my moral beliefs. However, if I were one of the prisoners, would my moral beliefs really matter? In order to survive, there were no choices but to accept the illegal ways of survival. To survive, we tend to rely on our instincts rather on out morality. In other words, we don't care whether something is "legal" or "illegal;" only surviving matters.

Journal 7 : A Good Day

“Today is a good day. We look around like blind people who have recovered their sight, and we look at each other. We have never seen each other in sunlight: someone smiles. If it was not for the hunger! (pg 73)”

Finally, a bright sun rose upon the prisoners as if it was shining “hope” for the prisoners. From the book, it says, “Today the sun rose bright and clear for the first time from the horizon of mud. It is a Polish sun, cold, white, and distant, and only warms the skin, but when it dissolved the last mists a murmur ran through our colorless numbers, and when even I felt its lukewarmth through my clothes I understood how men can worship the sun. (pg 71)” Before a shiny sunlight has covered them, the Jews were living a colorless life. Everything seemed gray, the sky, the morning, the dark, the people, and even their life. Gray is a color that symbolizes dullness, colorless, and paleness. I bet no other color could represent the lives of the Jews in the concentration camp better than the color gray. Since excitements hardly exist in the harsh conditions, no one was able to express a significant color to the prison. However, as spring has come, the sunlight also began to bless the Jews. As the quote above, people smiled at each other below the sunlight. By just imagining the tired Jews smiling makes me realize how the small things, such as the sunlight which shines to us every day, was very valuable and appreciable to them.

Journal 6 : The Work

It was hilarious to notice that the term “work” in concentration camp is preventing the work they are assigned. However I agree since who would want to do work all day long which requires harsh labor? But the fun part was when Levi stated “The latrine is an oasis of peace. (pg 68)” It seems both prisoners and students may agree that bathroom is an oasis of peace while they are working or studying. To connect with my experience, sometimes I tend to go to the bathroom with small excuses, such as when my hand gets dirty by using a pencil for a long time. Even though my purpose is to clean my hands, sometimes I go to the bathroom to feel a “temporary peace” and to escape from getting bored by my teacher’s lectures. Also, Levi understood that in order to finish work smoothly, he should have a helpful partner who could help him out thoroughly. He said “I will try and place myself with Resnyk; he seems a good worker and being taller will support the greater part of the weight (pg 67)” which is also similar to us, students. Sometimes, when we receive huge projects which are important for our class, we tend to choose one of the smartest students in class to receive more help and to work out the project more easily. I realized somehow people have similarities when they encounter a hard task, whether they are in prison, school, or home. Rather than accepting the hard work and managing it, it is common that we tend to escape from it.

Journal 5 : The Nights

“But the man who leaves the Ka-Be, naked and almost always insufficiently cure, feels himself ejected into the dark and cold of sidereal space. His trousers fall down, his shoes hurt him, his shirt has not buttons. He searches for a human contact and only finds backs turned on him. He is as helpless and vulnerable as a new-born baby, but the following morning he will still have to march to work. (pg 57) ”

No wonder why Primo Levi’s book has been praised by people with admiration. He certainly has a remarkable gift of writing which absorbs the reader inside to his book. From Chapter 5, as soon as I was ending the first page, a significant quote captured me once again. By four sentences, Levi made me to realize how thankful I should feel towards my safety and caring environment. To re-mention about the Ka-Be, Ka-Be was not a paradise where the Jews could rest, but was a place where they could reminiscence the old memories and realize how crucial the reality is. After suffering and having a little rest at the same time, the Jews definitely had to leave the Ka-Be. However, without any appropriate clothing, a man had to head towards to the place where he used to be, feeling insecure and lonely. Yet, it was obvious that no one would care for another man but only care about one self. Although a man had returned from a Ka-Be, no one would greet him since the reality in Auschwitz is different. If I return home after being in a hospital even for two days, I am sure my family would welcome me with comfort and try to help me sincerely. However, it was an impossible scene in Auschwitz. Since the man has now healed, the next day he must head to work.
How painful would it be, to work without knowing the purpose of working and even not knowing why they have to suffer under the German controls? Moreover, there is no one to share his or her pains.
However, it made me wonder, is friendship actually reliable in Auschwitz? Since people have lost everything, small things such as spoons and shoes are appreciable in that situation. It is common for people to steal other possessions for their own satisfactory aspects, but eventually this might make Jews lose trust among the other people. Yet, the Jews might also be desperate of having a close person who could share his or her stories.
Immediately, Levi answered my concerns by stating, “Alberto is my best friend. He fights for his life but still remains everybody’s friend. He ‘knows’ whom to corrupt, whom to avoid, whose compassion to arouse, whom to resist. Yet he himself did not become corrupt. (pg 57)” However, it made me think once again. Is it possible to act as Alberto, being a friend to everyone? Sometimes when I think about Auschwitz, it would be great to have a friend who I could rely on throughout the hardships I have to manage. However, sometimes I feel not having a friend would be better in the prison. In a place where deaths commonly exist, you do not know when your precious friend would leave, or when you would leave. In my opinion, spoon stealers could also hurt me, but a death of a friend would truly damage me.

Journal 4 : Ka-Be

My discussion group analyzed a lot about the purpose of Ka-Be last week, which was very exciting. The Ka-Be, which is an abbreviation of Krankenbau, is known as the infirmary inside the concentration camp. However, we had different points of view towards the Ka-Be. What is the true purpose of Ka-Be? Is it truly made to aid the ill people? The Germans kill hundreds of Jews with no sympathy, but how could they think of forming an infirmary inside the camp to cure the illnesses? However, maybe their purpose was to energize the weakened workers who are not able to work thoroughly. However, it was so ironic. The Germans are going to kill the Jews anyways if they get sick, but why dare to save them?

Not only the Germans, but also the opinions of the Jews were interesting. Primo Levi stated "Chajim rejoices with me: I have a good wound, it does not seem dangerous, but it should be enough to guarantee me a discreet period of rest. I will spend the night in the hut with the others, but tomorrow morning, instead of going to work, I will have to show myself to the doctors for the definitive examination… (pg 47)" When I heard about the Ka-Be, I thought I would never want to go there and try to avoid any possible injuries. It would be painful, but I would rather work and not meet any more Germans in the infirmary. The infirmary is a place to rest when you are sick, but it is inside the “concentration camp” and that makes a different point. You do not know what the Germans could do to you while you are sleeping and rather than feeling peaceful, I am sure I would feel anxious all the time while I am inside there. However, Levi had a different point at the first time. He was glad to have the opportunity of staying inside the Ka-Be and have some rest. But later on, he realized “Ka-Be is the Lager without its physical discomforts. So that whoever still has some seed of conscience, feels his conscience re-awaken; and in the long empty ways, one speaks of other things than hunger and work and one begins to consider what they have made us become, how much they have taken away from us, what this life is. In this Ka-Be, an enclosure of relative peace, we have learnt that our personality is fragile, that it is much more in danger than our life… (pg 55)” It was heart breaking to notice that even a peaceful rest was painful as the term death in Auschwitz.

Journal 3 : Initiation

I tend to take a shower every morning before I go to school. It is now a natural habit to me so even though I wake up late in the morning, I skip breakfast and rather take a shower. However, I imagined myself as being one of the prisoners in Auschwitz. Would I even have energy to wash my face or my hands? In Chapter 3, Levi introduced Steinlauf who was washing himself with passion. Although the prisoners did not have any soaps or shampoos, Steinlauf was washing his body. However, Levi had a different opinion of washing. “…Steinlauf sees me and greets me, and without preamble asks me severely why I do not wash. Why should I wash? Would I be better off than I am? Would I please someone more? Would I live a day, an hour longer? I would probably live a shorter time, because to wash is an effort, a waste of energy and warmth. Does not Steinlauf know that after half an hour with the coal sacks every difference between him and me will have disappeared? (pg 40)” After thinking about this quote, I realized Levi was true. Would being clean after using “effort and energy” would worth much better than resting for a while? No one knows when the Jews are going to die. Death might be crawling behind and capture them to death after a minute or an hour passes. Future is always obscure in reality but it is much vaguer in the prison of Auschwitz. Actually, it is scarier since it is “seriously unpredictable.” If it were predictable of knowing when you are going to die, you would have little bit of relief in life than not knowing it. No matter what, the prisoners had the possibility of encountering death anyways. However, they do not know when or how soon they would have to accept the situation. Thus, Levi’s point was miserable but true. There was no existence of energy and time for the Jews to worry about their appearance, since only death was their worries.

Journal 2 : On the Bottom

They are showing their arms.

It is always interesting to notice the deeper meanings of a title. From Chapter 2, I tried to connect the title with the summary to understand the story with depth. First “On the Bottom” reminded me of the chambers located underground. As the Auschwitz Video showed us, the Germans located the gas chambers under the ground to avoid the painful screams of the Jews. To me, the underground chambers were “breath-taking” in a negative way. How painful would the Jews feel when they just enter to the underground chamber, which is large, empty, and chilly? I can feel my heart shivering whenever I imagine about it. It is creepy to notice that it is possible for the Germans to make the Jews end up their lives in that empty room. In overall, the Jews might leave the world behind, with daunting memories placed inside their hearts. How intimidating is that to imagine? However, only the underground chambers did not satisfy the deeper meaning of the title (which might be only my opinion).
From the Chapter 2, as the Jews entered the room, they had to be naked in order to shave their hairs and wash their bodies. They were dying of hunger and thirst but no one cared about it. Later, they also had to endure the pain of their new names, which are actually numbers, “carved” on their arms. “Nothing belongs to us any more; they have taken away our clothes, our shoes, even our hair; if we speak, they will not listen to us, and if they listen, they will not understand. They will even take away our name: and if we want to keep it, we will have to find ourselves the strength to do so, to manage somehow so that behind the name something of us, of us as we were, still remains (pg 27).” Now, they did not have any more precious possessions. They lost everything inside the concentration camp, including their clothes, shoes, hair, and even their names. Now the Jews were sank on the bottom of their lives. Not only they had traveled to the bottom of the chambers, their lives were also located on the bottom, with nothing to lose anymore. In my opinion, "On the Bottom" not only meant about the journey to the bottom chambers, but it was also the starting point of the Jews sinking to the bottom in their lives.